Never an easy task to behold,
Deciding when to take control.
Knowing what choice you make,
Will be forever in effect.
Do I stay my course of self reliance,
Or is it safe to let down my guard.
I am trying to hold to what I want,
But the powers of happiness are overwhelming.
How do I know if I am ready to give in,
Or will it be when I end the asking.
I see it before me, this joy near me,
But then I see another, and the heart flutters.
Does that make me wrong,
Does that make me unworthy.
Will it be this way always,
Or am I being tested.
Nor do I care to continue my pain.
I could stay where I am and be content,
But I fear I may always wonder.
Always wonder about that grass,
The green one over the fence.
How do you move past the desire,
The longing to know how it is.
How can I just stay in the realm of happiness,
When so many temptations exist.
How did I make it to this point,
Where I'd question my abilities.
After all that has occurred,
All that I've had to endure, I should know.
Give me guidance, knowledge from within,
To make the decision to go the right way.
Keep my mind focused on the choice at hand,
Without straying the course.
My destiny seems to yet be decided,
As I wander down the paths of change.
I see that the rode I am traveling is hard,
And my decision is harder.
This choice I make will alter it all,
Changing my course of life.
Am I ready to make that jump,